The US’s favorite groping agency The Transportation Security Administration, otherwise known as the TSA, is set to expand beyond airports; and will soon grope every individual at bus, train, and marine transportation stations across the US.


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Already many people avoid airports like the plague to distance themselves from the perpetual molestations committed by the TSA. But now there could be no way around the United State’s legal pervert agency’s reach, being that Congress plans to expand the agency to cover rail, highways, and marine transportation.

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Several U.S. senators from both sides of the aisle have introduced a bill that will make travelers lives a living hell. As perpetually-terrified as the U.S. Department of Homeland Security likes to keep the population, considering the TSA’s phenomenally negative reputation at airports — passengers missing flights due to long lines, free molestations, confiscations of breast milk, and countless other good times — it’s highly doubtful the proposed legislation will receive more than tepid public support.

Currently 80 percent of the agency’s $7.4 billion budget is spent on aviation security. Only 2 percent of the TSA’s funding goes to surface transportation, according to a report by the Office of Inspector General earlier this month. Congress is looking to change that.

A bipartisan bill introduced Thursday by Senator John Thune (R-S.D.) would require the TSA to use a risk-based security model for these transport modes and to budget money based on those risks. It would require a wider use of the agency’s terrorist watch list by train operators and more detailed passenger manifests along with tighter screening of marine employees. The legislation also would increase the TSA’s canine use by as many as 70 dog-handler teams for surface transportation. – Bloomberg

Despite what is actually going to happen, the senate is telling everyone not to “get ruffled feathers” — because, trust them, it’s not at all what you think.

“This is very much not creating for bus or rail transportation the [security] model that exists for aviation,” asserted spokesman for the Senate Committee on Commerce, Science, and Transportation, Frederick Hill, as quoted by Bloomberg.

An enormous increase in “security” at bus stations, on highways, and train stations is not what the public needs or wants. This bill is yet more evidence of the US slowly slipping and sliding into Martial Law.

Works Cited

Justin Bachman . “ After New York Attack, Congress Wants TSA to Secure Amtrak, Buses .” Bloomberg. . (2016): . .